An Interview With God

I dreamed I had an interview with God.

“So you would like to interview me?” God asked.

“If you have the time” I said.

God smiled. “My time is eternity.” “What questions do you have in mind for me?”

“What surprises you most about humankind?”

God answered...

“That they get bored with childhood, they rush to grow up, and then long to be children again.”

“That they lose their health to make money... and then lose their money to restore their health.”

“That by thinking anxiously about the future, they forget the present, such that they live in neither the present nor the future.”

"That they live as if they will never die, and die as though they had never lived.”

God’s hand took mine and we were silent for a while.

And then I asked...
“As a parent, what are some of life’s lessons you want your children to learn?”

“To learn they cannot make anyone love them. All they can do is let themselves be loved.”

“To learn that it is not good to compare themselves to others.”

“To learn to forgive by practicing forgiveness.”

“To learn that it only takes a few seconds to open profound wounds in those they love, and it can take many years to heal them.”

“To learn that a rich person is not one who has the most, but is one who needs the least.”

“To learn that there are people who love them dearly, but simply have not yet learned how to express or show their feelings.”

“To learn that two people can look at the same thing and see it differently.”

“To learn that it is not enough that they forgive one another, but they must also forgive themselves.”

"Thank you for your time," I said humbly.

"Is there anything else you would like your children to know?"

God smiled and said,

“Just know that I am here... always.”

The Sea and the primary school kids

A number of Primary Schools were doing a project on "The Sea". Kids were
asked to write about their experiences.

Teachers got together to compare the results, and put together some of the
comments that were funny, and some that were sad. Here are some of them.
The kids were all aged between 5 and 8 years.


* This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age 6)

* Whales are animals, not fish. If they don't get air they can drown, like
my brother did last summer. (David age 7)

* Oysters balls are called pearls. (James age 6)

* I don't like the sea. It makes me sick on the ferry. (Peter age 6)

* My goldfish died. Why? (Katie age 5)

* If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea
all round you, you are in continent. (Wayne age 7)

* I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like
Emily Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)

* A dolphin breaths through an arsehole on the top of it's head.(Billy age
8)

* My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs.(Millie
age 6)

* When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the
ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to
make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans.
(William age 7)

* I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails.How do
mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6)

* I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always
screaming and being sick, my Dad keeps shouting at my Mum, and my big
sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy age 6)

* Some fish are dangerous. Jelly fish can sting. Electric eels can give you
a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have
to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)

* My mum has fish nets, but doesn't catch any fish. (Laura age 5)

* When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my
willy small. (Kevin age 6)

* When me and Sarah went to the sea side in the summer holidays, we hid
in the sand dunes and watched my big sister doing it with her boy friend.
It was fun. (Lauren age 7)

* A submarine goes under the water like a fish, but it has lots of seamen
inside. (Emma age 5)

* When I grow up, I want to be captain of a big ship, and have lots of
sailors (Valerie age 6)

* Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can't go
down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age 8)

* On holiday my Mum went water ski-ing. She fell off when she was going very
fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her fanny. (Julie
age 7)